Some people are nice and helpful because they want to be. Some are (pardon the truth) horse's fannies because they can and want to be.
As much as you want to, and as much as you try to be nice at all times you will still sometimes have to be firm--sometimes nasty.
Recently, after an attempt at nice, I had to be firm and nasty.
I had purchased a new cell phone(s) from a company I will not name, but their initials are AT&T. As a retired GM/UAW employee I qualified for a fairly substantial discount. The folks at the phone store looked at my retiree card, agreed, called into the home office, they agreed, and the discount was applied . . .
for a while.
A couple of days later I received an email requiring me to "prove" I merited the discount and giving a phone number to call. I called, spoke to a very nice woman, who spoke to her techies and all agreed I got the discount. . .
for a while.
I receive another email again requesting I "prove" I was eligible. I again called, this time speaking to a nice fellow, and re-explained the problem. He called his techies and they said I didn't qualify. I asked them to check again. Again they said "no." I asked them to check again and they said I needed a letter from GM!
I explained firmly that I wasn't going to even try and get a letter from GM. I qualified for the discount and provided ID, they had approved the discount and sold me the phone(s) under that agreement. Done deal. (We were approaching my, "Gimmie the discount dammit." place.
The young fellow, the middle man between the techies and I, was feeling the heat and clearly didn't know what to do. I told him to tell the techies that I was a tired, old, angry, former UAW negotiator and I wasn't going to argue any longer. We had an agreement. As far as I was concerned it was binding, BUT . . . if they didn't want to honor it I would simply keep the phones and the new pad, call VISA and cancel the charges, and, even though they might ultimately win in an arbitration or court it would cost them one heck of a lot more time, money and trouble than the discount was worth.
I also pointed out that as a retiree I had plenty of time I could use for free and their lawyers/secretaries would require payment, so give it their best.
The young fellow, who remained polite but shaky sounding throughout all this was at a loss. I suggested a supervisor might be in order. He connected me, and in about 45 seconds a bright, reasonable woman said I had the discount. I happily agreed, thanked her, and we parted amicably.
My point of course, is that the horse's fannies who put the young fellow in a no win situation WANTED to be jerks. Others may have caved in, but after 30 years with the UAW, much of it negotiating agreements with GM, I was not in the habit of caving. I once told a personnel director that when he said, "No," I heard "later" and went ahead accordingly.
The pictures at the top of the post demonstrate my point, too. They are all of the same dog, my late, great, boxer Mac. He could be a playful pup, an ass-kicking protection dog, and a friend of children. It all depended on the situation. He's long gone now, but I still miss and love him. I also remember that he was brighter than most of the people he met--a great judge of character.
I'll close with this. Thrice, upon meeting certain unnamed men, each of whom were certified jerks, he simply walked up to them and peed on their leg. Lord how I loved that dog--and O how I wish I had a picture to show you of that!
Don't take no for an answer when you are right--and don't be a jerk when it isn't called for. Make the world a better place!
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